CHAPTER 8: LOOSE LIPS sink ships

CHAPTER 8: LOOSE LIPS sink ships

Emotionally hurt it highly likely. You might just jump into your old patterns with people you trusted prior. Something to understand is that if you spouse neglected your trust there may be many people that also betrayed you that are in her camp. An important lesson to learn is that your wife friends and friends that are your and your wife's friends may no longer be your friends. They may be trying to milk information from you about finances, strategies, plan, your feelings or just to screw with your emotions or funnel warnings to your spouse/exspouse. It is important to understand that they may not be out for your best interest and that you must be. Put in another way, your soon to be exwife's parent's and friends are not your friends. Many times they knew all about the activities of your household and withheld it from you.

Another issue that has become more and more popular is social networks posting all your feeling for the world to see. It only takes one person tat knows a person for that to get back to your spouse. With over hundred possible leaks its not practical to maintain the gossip chain. So, get it off Facebook(R). Gossip is not the point. Get out the real story with a few real details, let the facts speak for themselves. It's important to know that this information not only can change the minds of the people around you but may be something to show you are harassing and making accusation. Remember, the law does not care who you are. You are a male harassing a poor defenseless female.

You may need to go off the grid in telephone/cellphone communication to ensure your spouse does not hunker down and get legal representation. Remember there is a bill every month that has everyone you called. If you looked at your bill saw a strange number and saw it was a law firm, what would you do? Some possible ideas are getting a calling card or Skype number you can use for legal communications (such as legal advice from you lawyer). Of course makes sure you are in a safe location outside of prying ears. Strangely enough your spouse may trust even if they are betraying your trust. If somethings different, they might run and get help and her trust you will be gone.

Another item to consider is written notes and typed communication need some extra scrutiny. Not everyone can keep all this information in their head and are required to write things down. Don't leave this information laying around. You might as well have the how to “Divorce your spouse without them knowing in 3 EZ Steps” book on the night stand. If you can't keep the information to yourself you might be in jeopardy.

It would be better to leave it at a friends house, safety deposit box, your parents, just ensure its not obvious what the information is, what its importance and relation is to you.

As its nice to have access to other things, its just as nice to have you own privacy in your communications if you are considering a legal direction. As stated before odds are your spouse reaction will not be good knowing you want out or you are planning the best for yourself verse their interests. When in fact you are still trying to make it work, but they will not be listening after they see you hide something. Change your passwords to your personal account that you spouse does not need access to like our email.

Over all, ensure your communication is directed to trusted sources, all other sources are limited to just a few facts in order to get what you need from them and ensure your communication lines are secure and in accessible by anyone else that might try to run interference.

*** USE AT YOUR OWN RISK. I am not a lawyer and this is not to be construed as legal advice. For any legal decision see the proper legal representative. You are the master of your soul.